November has been declared as America’s National Adoption Month. During this month the focus is three-fold. It is a month to celebrate the foster and adoptive families across America.
It is a month to recognize and provide support to the professionals working to find permanent and loving homes to children in America’s foster care system. It is a month, as individuals, to learn more about foster care, adoption, the needs of America’s children and respond.

The Child Welfare Information Gateway is an excellent resource and this month they have added to their website information about their campaign, Answering the Call. They are raising awareness about America’s children and youth from foster care. There is an emphasis on the adoption and care of America’s older children, as well as information for prospective parents, teachers, and professionals.

There are currently 128,000 children in the foster care system who are available for adoption.

Visit The Child Welfare Information Gateway to learn more about National Adoption Month, view the activities calendar and read the Presidential Proclamation.

Yesterday I received an email from one of our agencies. America World Adoption Association wrote the following blog post for a very urgent prayer need for four of their waiting children in eminent need. Perhaps you are or you know the person God is calling to take them home. Please click through and read on!

“We are requesting your prayers and advocacy assistance regarding four of our current China Program waiting children who are waiting for their forever families. Jonathan and Andrew have been registered with America World for roughly one year, but sadly little to no interest has been expressed in them throughout their time with America World. Ben and Abigail recently turned 13 years old and have a limited amount of time to find their family as children canÂ’t be adopted after they turn 14 years old.

Therefore, America World will be returning Jonathan, Andrew, Ben and AbigailÂ’s referrals to the CCAA on October 31st, 2008. It is the hope that the CCAA will place these children on the shared list or with another agency to try and find them families. Before the referrals are returned, we wanted to inform families so that there is the opportunity to come forward and inquire about their adoptions. There profiles will be posted in the next couple days on Precious.org.

Please read below for brief biographies of these precious children. To view photos and more biographical information, please contact America World and ask to speak to a China Family Coordinator or view them on Precious.org.

•Jonathan is a friendly and outgoing 9 ½ year old boy who has club feet and hands that are deformed. Despite these special needs he is able to use his hands to write and feed himself and is able to walk. He gets along well with other children and enjoys studying and singing. Jonathan is well liked by his teachers and caregivers.
•
Andrew is a boy with an active personality who is 5 ½ years old. While he has protrusion of his eyes, his vision is stated as normal and he enjoys reading. Andrew has a great memory and can recite various children’s folk songs and poems. He enjoys helping his caregivers with different tasks. He loves to run and jump and play outdoors. He also likes cartoons and enjoys listening to music.
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Ben is a smart 13 year-old boy who has cataract disease and lazy eyes. Despite this diagnosis, Ben can see as he has been fitted with an artificial lens. He loves school, is one of the best students in his class, and likes to help the teachers. Ben is described as active, outgoing, and is very interested in basketball. Ben’s orphanage reports that “he feels sad sometimes because most of the children in the orphanage get adopted except for him. He really wants a family.”
•
Abigail is an active and healthy 13 year old girl. She is described as active and talkative. Her caretakers state that she insists on going to school everyday and likes learning Chinese. She is good at verbal expression, language development, and loves to write. Abigail likes to watch TV after finishing her homework in the evening.

America World has resources available for families who would like to consider adopting one of these children, including, updated referral information in additional to the original referrals. Referral information includes medical reports, the childÂ’s history and the orphanage and their photos. We also have contact information for references of families who have adopted older children or children with similar special needs to those of these 4 children.
•
AWAA can also provide a list of international specialists who can help review the childÂ’s referral. A family that reviews the referral is not committed to that adoption. The review process allows time to consult medical professionals to decide if your family can care for the childÂ’s special needs and make the decision to decline or more forward with the adoption.

Families who are interested in learning more about Jonathan, Andrew, Ben or Abigail can contact a China Family Coordinator by emailing waitingchildren@awaa.org or calling 888-ONE-CHILD prior to October 31st, 2008.

Thank you for joining us in praying for these children and the plan the Lord has for them.”

It’s been a long time since the appearance of a new “This Month” reflection, and for that I apologize. At least half a dozen ideas have flitted through my mind like butterflies in a meadow, but not made it through my fingers and into the world. These next few months I am especially seeking faithfulness to God through reflection and writing, so hopefully posts will be more regular (and “This Month” won’t turn into “this Year”).

Yesterday, I was talking on the phone to a dear friend. She told me that, rather to her surprise, she has asked for more information about a girl who needs a family.

This is the kind of adoption that could turn life upside down. The girl, Rose, is of unknown age, probably about 13. She’s been severely malnourished and experienced great hardship; she doesn’t read or write, and doesn’t know English. My friend is trying to figure out whether it is wise and responsible to bring Rose into their family, explaining to her two children (both eager to forge ahead) the possible inconvenient and painful consequences of adopting a teenager.

This adoption could reorder the rest of the lives of every person in that family. It is impossible to predict how Rose will respond to a stable family life and what course her healing might take. She may not be well enough for a traditional education and job; my friend and her husband and children may need to take care of her intensively for the rest of their lives. It could disrupt their activities and routines, home improvements, vacations, marriages. It could toss around the different parts of their lives like clothes strewn unpredictably and recklessly out of a drawer.

After I hung up the phone, it came to me in a flash how short life is. If this family or someone else adopts Rose, there is great potential for pain and chaos. There is also great hope for the dawning of redemption and God’s healing in a human life. The grace and love of the Lord could come washing through Rose, and my friend and everyone in her family would have the privilege of witnessing it, delivering it, taking a part in God turning ashes to beauty. My experience has been that there is no greater joy than that. It might be just glimmers for a while, mixed in with much suffering as they deal with the consequences of brokenness. But the suffering is temporary and the redemption is forever.

It hit me like a brick that life is short and eternity is long. If they adopt Rose, it may be really hard, maybe the hardest thing they’ve ever done. But it will be over so quickly. Standing before Jesus with Rose – and with the others that her life ripples out to - would be a greater joy than they can imagine. No matter how hard this part of life it, it is only a vapor.

My realization vanished as quickly as it appeared, and the pressing concerns in front of me seemed like solid reality again. We are so surrounded by the press of the temporal world that the real reality is veiled. Only in brief flashes of insight, it seems, do our eyes truly fix on the unseen, letting us understand that “our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us a glory that far outweighs them all.” (2 Corinthians 4:17)

This friend of mine has been reading Mother Teresa, who reflected that when Jesus summons us to something, we often hesitate: “Whenever He asks for something…people get extra careful about many things — but if the world asks the things are done so quickly.” We all would agree that it is right to carefully consider the cost before leaping naively into the adoption of a teenager. This may not be the Lord’s plan for their family, or for Rose. But my friend is wrestling with why we so often hang back when Jesus asks something of us. To be honest, many times it’s probably because He bids us to take up a cross, lose our life and die with him. But we who belong to Jesus have already died with Him. When we grasp at comfort and security, we are forgetting that our lives are not our own but have been bought with a price.

“He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose.” - Jim Elliot

Please pray for Rose.

Read more of Kristin Wong’s writing here.

I am preparing to do an entire blog series on affording adoption. My plan was to sit down today during my son’s nap time and post some great information. This did not happen! The nap happened, but between the phone ringing and the knocks on the door today’s blog got lost on the to-do list. I do want to take a moment, especially as the weekend is approaching, and share a resource with you. My dear friends have been talking with me about couponing for some time now. I was not won over, until recently. Through much conversation and online reading I have become a fan of Money Saving Mom. Through her advise and the hundreds of others that post and interact with this site I have found a way to save money each week on our family grocery bill and food budget. This money is now going towards the adoption fund for our second child. It is amazing how much a little effort and planning can save your family. I have always said about raising money for adoption that it is not always about asking the Lord for the money, but asking Him to teach you to use what you already have. This is a good place to start!
I promise, more coming soon on raising funds towards an adoption. If you have any good suggestions let us know!

In the evenings when all is calm in our house I spend a bit of time going through a list of blogs that I enjoy following. A handful of these blogs are from fellow adoptive parents and friends who are reflecting upon raising their children and their current adoption journies. My husband looks across the room at me as I laugh out loud at their stories, as I shake my head in understanding at their experiences on the adoption road, and as I let out a sigh that communicates that thier words made an impact on my heart.
I want to share with you a glimpse of a blog that is written by a friend of mine who is currently in the waiting phase of the adoption process for a sibling set from Ethiopia, Africa. She and her husband along with their three children began the adoption process thinking they would adopt one child at this time and perhaps adopt again in the future. But, they have chosen to adopt a sibling set after considering how many children in the world need to wake up in the stable and loving arms of a family. They are prayerful, hopeful, exicted, and have open and ready hearts. Sherry uses her blog as a way to get her feelings out as she waits. It is a form of therapy that many a felllow adoptive mother has found!
She posted yesterday that although she knew the day would come she found herself unprepared at the first negative comment made to her regarding the adoption of her children. I do not konw the exact comment that was made to her, but I do know that it was an implied that by adoption older siblings of another race she was setting herself up for uneeded difficulties. The comments hit her heart and she was not able to simply let them go.
Words have power.
A day later a friend spoke another set of powerful words over her. This time the power of the words were not destructive, instead they fortified the stronghold of her dedication to her adoption, beliefs, and faith. Read slowly.

“Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.” ~ 1 Corinthians 15:58

My friends wrote in her blog this that I want to share:
“And so I’ve been pondering on the power of the spoken word. It can be a curse or a blessing. How often have I failed to speak encouragement over someone who needs it? Do I only encourage when I sense someone is down and out? How often have I spoken careless words that have left a sting in someone else’s spirit? How often have I tried to encourage someone with my own words, when the Lord’s words would be so much better? Ask the Lord to give you a word for someone who needs to hear from Him. Your words are more powerful than you know! So I encourage first myself and then you – speak blessing and encouragement over those you encounter today.”

Today, after you take a sneak peak at the Semlow Adoption Blog I ask you to take some time to consider her words. Speak blessings to those around you. And, just for an added blessing to yourself if you know another adoptive parent give them a call and with your words lift them up. Your words will come back to them during a time when someone else may have spoken destruction.

The Dave Thomas Foundation has released their annual Best Adoption Friendly Workplaces recently. 100 workplaces have been chosen based on 919 surveys completed by U.S. employers. They are judged upon both the amount of paid leave given to adoptive parents and the amount of financial reimbursement offered.
As adoptive families advocate for benefits each year there is a increase in employers giving adoption benefits. If you would like to learn more about the top 100 workplaces and how to help advocate for adoption benefits from your employer you can visit The Dave Thomas Foundation and Adoptive Families Magazine.

A few months ago I met a woman named Deb. She and I are close in age, both have one son that share a name, and have a real love for sharing a chaotic cup of coffee as the boys run circles around our feet with their cars, trucks, and sippycups.
Deb called yesterday. They received their referral for a little Ethiopian boy. She was a woman who’s spirit was running over with joy. Although she had only seen this child’s picture she has claimed him as her son, completely and entirely. She has set her love on him and although he does not know it yet he has a family once more.
Deb told me a story that I must share. She said that a few weeks ago she felt conviction for not praying about her adoption process enough. Like most of us she was coping with the wait by putting it in the back of her mind. But, God spoke clearly to her. He told her to pray and she did. Deb sat down in her chair and began journaling. She wrote a simple prayer, “Whose ever heart beats closest to his, help them to love him and protect him.”
A few days later Deb received a call from her social worker. The very day that Deb wrote out her prayer for her unknown son a little boy had been surrendered to an orphanage in Ethiopia by a loving family member. That little boy is now her son and she knows fully that her prayer came to be. Her son was loved, dearly. Her son was cherished, dearly. Her son is coming home soon.

For Deb and all of those waiting~ keep praying! Cover your children, even if you know nothing about them yet, in prayer. Lift them up to the Lord, who loves them in a powerful way, so that they may be protected mind, body, and spirit.

Deb, we wait eagerly for your little son to arrive home on that airplane. We rejoice with you. We wait with you. We celebrate his family in Ethiopia, his life, and his future as a child that has been rescued by the love of Christ!

I am reading a book called, A Distant Grief. I was written by F. Kefa Sempangi. I am on page three and have already been busy using my highlighter and dialoging passionately with my husband about the words on the page before me. I feel as if I am having a cup of coffee with the author, he is talking calmly and confidently meanwhile my mind is being blown as I attempt to act non-challant at our table.
He writes about the reign of terror under Idi Amin in Uganda, about the church, about light diminishing darkness. What he says entirely I do not know yet as again I am on page three.

Many of us are sitting in our living rooms thinking about the people in China that have endured the earthquakes and aftershocks. We think of the people of Myanmar who have endured the recent cyclone. These two events alone have resulted in hundreds of thousands of people finding themselves in the midst of great loss and uncertainty, of pain and poverty, of disease and displacement.

Then there are those living all around us who are homeless, hungry, lost. There are people in the Sudan, Chechnya, Congo to name a few that are experiencing torture. There are children growing up not knowing what safety and security are like, entire generations being raised in nothing but bloodshed.

Within our communities there is human trafficking, child abuse, domestic violence.
We read beautiful books such as, The Kite Runner, and are deeply touched by the stories of those that have endured oppression. I watched the movie with my husband. When we turned it off I sobbed and sobbed. “This type of horror is happening to people in our world, honey.” I kept crying until finally it was time to move on.

But, that last statement right there is what keeps bugging me. “Time to move on….” when exactly is that? My heart tells me that it is never time to move on.

So, why is it that we do move on? That we turn our eyes onto our own agendas?
That we spend our money on fleeting fashion rather than helping our starving brothers? That we stay quiet rather than advocating for those that are not being heard? That we ignore what is truly going on around us?

Sempangi writes, ” In that moment I learned a new truth. I learned that just as there is a boundary beyond which human beings cannot comprehend the glory of God, so there is a boundary beyond which they cannot comprehend the evil in this world. There is a boundary beyond which everything is a senseless chasm. It is here in the nightmare of utter chaos that human feeling dies. It is here, where death and terror seem to have full dominion, that even the deepest sorrow becomes but a distant grief.”

I like this. It makes sense to me. If I could comprehend the glory of God in it’s fullness then I would have to turn the TV off. I think if I truly could comprehend all of God’s glory then I have to admit I would be a little crazy in my efforts to praise Him. Just the same, if I truly could comprehend the plights facing my fellow human beings, my brothers and sisters in Christ, on a daily basis I do not think I could function as a normal person. I think I would be a little crazy in my efforts to help them.

But, I have to ask…what is wrong with being a little crazy? Just because we can not comprehend his full glory does not mean that his Glory does not exsist. In fact, we miss out when we ignore it. Just because we can not comprehend all the pain and darkness going on around us does not mean it does not exsist.

There is grief around us. There is a need for Light to shine and take over the darkness. We are to be that Light. Turn off your TV, turn away from the computer, do what you must to help those that need help.

May the Glory of God shine on you as you shine Light on the darkness!

Just 36 hours ago, Maria Sue Chapman, adopted and youngest daughter of Steven Curtis & Mary Beth Chapman, was killed in a tragic accident in the family driveway. She was LifeFlighted to Vanderbilt Children’s Hospital, but for only reasons God can explain, she went home to Him.

The news was like a shot to the hearts of tens of thousands of men and women, sons and daughters, moms and dads that have been impacted by this incredible family. Steven and Mary Beth are the founders of Shaohannahs Hope, an organization created to reach orphans and help remove the financial barriers of adoption. It’s impossible to imagine the grief that the Chapmans are feeling tonight. It’s beyond grasp.

For those of you that don’t know of the Chapmans, they are amazing. Just one year ago, I had the opportunity to meet Stephen up close. He flew in for one night to give a free concert to some of us attending an event called Adoption Summit III. As a top GRAMMY-winning, DOVE award winning Christian recording artist, this wasn’t a glory event for him. It was just a group of people who had given their lives to those considered least in the world. . . orphans.

Steven’s wife Mary Beth couldn’t make it . . . she was busy being a mom. But in classic fashion, she sent a video she made that morning. It was her and their three adopted daughters. They encouraged us all to not give up and continue fighting the good fight.

Right after that, Steven shared a song with us that he had never played publicly before. It was simply called “Cinderella”. As my own adopted daughter plays with a pink ribbon right next to me and in light of this tragedy, Stephen’s lyrics carry new and even more profound meaning today. We’ll never listen to this song the same again.

“So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
‘Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh I will dance with Cinderella
I don’t wanna miss even one song,
(even one song)
Cuz all to soon the clock will strike midnight
And she’ll be gone”

The Chapmans are a family that will make it through this incredible tragedy. Their life is based on a deep devotion to the one true God. They will never waiver. But right now, more then ever, they need our collective prayers.

When we search for words at times of great loss and heartache they often seem lacking in power and depth. We ask ourselves if there is something we can do to convey our heart, our shared sadness, our support for a friend. We can pray. Prayer is powerful, real, raw. It is not cliche’, but alive and active.

Today, we ask that you pray for the Chapman family. Despite believing fully that their sweet daughter, Maria Sue, is joyful and safe in Heaven we know that they have heavy hearts and carry a deep grief within them. Please embrace the Chapman family now through your prayers. We desire to have them covered night and day in prayer.

———————–

Jesus,

May guilt not be allowed to abide in the hearts of this family. May you, Jesus, give them full confidence in your promises, plan, and unfailing love for Maria Sue and their family.

May they know, fully, that they have not said goodbye. May they be a comfort to one another, bind them together Lord, speak to them continuously of your love for them.

Fill them, Jesus, with the peace that passes all of our understanding.

Amen

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We invite you to post your prayer for the Chapmans right here. Please take a moment and do so. Simply click on “Submit Comment”.

* In lieu of flowers, the Chapmans request any gifts be directed to Shaohannah’s Hope.

Take a moment and learn more about foster care as the Seattle based Casey Family Programs celebrates twenty years of May as National Foster Care Month. There are more than a half a million children in foster care. Casey asks us to turn our attention to the needs of these children and to salute the foster care families, social workers, and advocates who care for them.
There are over 12 million foster care alumni living in the United States at present. Currently, there are over 513,000 American children in fostercare. They average 10 years old and will remain in the foster system over a year. Each year 20,000 children age-out of the foster care system.
Many of the children in the American foster care system have experience great loss, abuse, neglect, and exposure to addictions and instability. These children are in desperate need of every day adults to believe in them and care for them to empower them to overcome their troubled childhoods.
Thank you to all the unsung heroes of foster care children, to the foster parents, mentors, teachers, pastors, advocates, and friends. We salute you!

Please visit the foster care month website to learn more.